Milkshake Night

I’m the one in the chair, and my sister Roz is sitting on the counter. What great times.


Father’s Day is coming up. It reminds me of one of my favorite childhood memories – milkshake night. My father was a busy man. He owned the family business.  It seemed like he never got any time off. When he did get time off, he was really tired. Yet as tired as he was, my sister and I both knew that deep down he really loved us.
Every Saturday night was milkshake night. Our freezer was always filled with tons of ice cream. My sister and I would alternate. One week I would choose the flavor the next week she would choose the flavor. We chose flavors like strawberry, vanilla with chocolate chips, mint and chocolate chip, or just plain chocolate. It was so much fun!
We had an old-fashioned blender. Dad would pull out the blender and stand right beside us. In my case I would grab the spoon, my father would help me scoop up the ice cream, then I would grab the bottle of syrup. He would guide my hands as I squeezed it in until he said, “Okay that’s enough stop.” Dad was there to guide us every step of the way until we were done making the milkshake. Then we got to enjoy the milkshakes together as a family.
Milkshake night was our one-on-one father-daughter bonding time with Dad. If it ever seemed like Dad was so busy that he didn’t have time for his family, milkshake night was his way of reassuring us of his love for us. It was his simple way of saying, “I’m here for you and I love you.”

The Broken Sprinkler

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”
John 15:5

 

I live at home with my mother. She’s not exactly a handywoman, but she tries.  The other day the sprinkler was broken. She looked at it but didn’t know what to do. She left it alone for a while because she didn’t want to make the problem any worse, After a few weeks, she decided it was time to try again. She went to the hardware store to get a part, and came back and tried again. When she came back, she cut off the main valve to the sprinkler without realizing it was the main source of water, and it got plugged up!  
 When she told me, we both laughed.“Think of the parable of the branches. She said. “When we cut ourselves off from our source of strength, what happens?” 
  Mother’s right. How many times have you felt overwhelmed and said, “I can’t do this!” Did you ever stop to think that maybe you’re overwhelmed because you’re trying to do it all by yourself? I need help with things that most people would take for granted–like getting dressed. Without Jesus, I couldn’t handle the challenges of CP.  Who’s your source of strength?
Jesus, help me to always rely on you for strength.
Amen

Snap Out of It!

   

On Saturday, I went to a writers’ conference. The main thing they emphasized was that your attitude and your heart are the most important thing. Writing is a tough business and very tedious at times. If somebody isn’t doing it for the right reasons, it’s very easy for their thoughts to turn negative very quickly.
            To keep us from thinking or saying negative thoughts about the writing process, they gave us rubberbands to put on our wrists. We had to wear them all day. Whenever we said or thought something negative, we had to pull the rubberbands.  If somebody heard us say something negative, they could reach over and pull our rubberband for us. If we started thinking negatively, the rubberbands were there to help us snap out of it!
As Christians, our lives are supposed to be a ministry. I believe the reason we get so easily burdened by our ministry is because we are focused on the wrong things. How many times have you thought, I don’t fit in. Maybe I should quit. Instead, what we should be thinking is, does this fit in with what Jesus would have me do?  If we keep our eyes fixed on Jesus, He will be our rubberband. When we have doubts or questions about the wisdom of God’s ways, Jesus will help us snap out of it!
Jesus, help me to fix my eyes on you.
Amen

Mariners Christrian School

On  March 31, I went down to my sister’s school and spoke to the Elementary school kids about my  disability during their Chapel time. Here’s what I said to the kids.  Enjoy!

    My name is Rachael Benson. I’m Miss Benson’s sister. I have CP or Cerebral Palsy. I was born on February 8, 1983. I was born two months early because I got pneumonia while I was in my mother’s womb, which caused a lack of oxygen supply to my brain, which caused the CP.

    The main thing I want to stress is that I was born this way. You’re not going to get what I have by coming up to me. CP is a condition not a disease. If I were sick, I wouldn’t be able to be here. I may move a little slower than you or have to do a few things differently, but I’m just like you. When I went to school, I was in regular classes and did all the homework everyone else did. I had a one on one aide with me in the classroom. My aide acted as my hands, to do the work I couldn’t do. When it was time to do math, my aide would write the problems for me and I would tell her how to do the problem step by step. If there was a craft, my aide would cut the pieces of paper with scissors, and I would glue the shapes. If there was a string involved, my aide would cut and tie the string and I would pull the loose ends.

    I got the same grades everyone else got for the effort I put out there. The only difference was that it might have taken me longer to finish an assignment. I can’t write so I type. I don’t have full use of my hands so I type using just my index fingers. What takes someone who has full use of his or her hands ten minutes, might take me twenty minutes. The work gets done and the teacher gets the assignment on time. Sometimes I’m so careful about timelines that it drives other people crazy!! My mom tells me, “Don’t worry, it will get done. “Quit fretting!” She would say. But I still fret every now and then.

    My disability is physical not mental. Sometimes people will ask the person next to me, “Why is she in a wheelchair?” I’ll immediately jump in with an answer like, “I was born this way.” I may even show them how my wheelchair works. I also have a walker. When I was in school, I played kickball. Somebody else kicked the ball, and I ran the bases. I was pretty fast! If you have a question about me, it’s okay to direct the question to me. Go ahead be bold! You won’t hurt my feelings. I love educating people. When I was in high school, and the kids would do that, my aide would say, “Ask Rachael. She has a physical disability, not a mental disability.”

     Fifteen years ago my father died of a massive heart attack. He was the one who really set the tone for how the family would handle my disability forever. When I was born, we knew I had a condition, but we didn’t know what it was. I wasn’t diagnosed with CP until I was three months old. When I came home, my father said, “This is now the new normal.” He meant that it was going to be normal for our family to go to ten different doctors. It was going to be normal for our family to go to physical and occupational therapy on a weekly basis. That was the way our life was going to be, and that was okay. Anything the family did, I did too- maybe just a little differently.

    My mother has always said, “Focus on what you can do, not what you can’t do.” She has always said that God has had a purpose for allowing me to have CP even if we don’t understand all the reasons.

    I call Romans 8:28 my life verse. It says, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him who are called according to his purpose.” There’s a purpose in me having CP, or God wouldn’t allow it. God doesn’t allow any trial in our life that’s not going to bring us closer to him. Maybe without the CP, it would be harder for me to have a faith in God. I really believe that because I have CP, that means I need help with certain things that a person without a disability wouldn’t need help with, therefore I get to see how God works in people’s lives and experience his goodness. Having to depend on other people has taught me about the freedom we have when we accept Jesus into our hearts. God didn’t say oops when I was born. He’s perfect. A lot of people have a hard time accepting Jesus into their hearts because it means letting go of control of their lives. They’re afraid they’re missing out on something good. They think God is a God of rules and regulations and they have to give up their fun when they come to him.

    The truth is, it’s just the opposite. If I didn’t have God and a loving family in my life, I don’t think I could handle the challenges of having CP. It helps me to know that there’s someone greater than me helping me carry the weight. Someone who walked the earth and experienced every emotion I’ve experienced before I was born. Yes I have moments of discouragement when I wish I didn’t have to have CPwatch.

    There were many times, and even today when I would think, “Why God Why?” Because I have Jesus in my life, I’m able to have peace and joy knowing that I’m not alone in my trials. Knowing that this life and this body are only temporary. Someday I’ll be in heaven with Jesus where I’ll have a body that can run without a walker, kick, and maybe even do a cartwheel.

    I graduated from Valencia High School in 2002. Then I went to College of the Canyons and in June 2007, I got my A.A. degree in Social Science. After that I went on to pursue a career in writing children’s books. I just got my first one published. It’s called “The Hunt for Heaven.” I’m working on a second one called “The Special Gift.” I also have a blogspot. http://rachaelsadventuresinfaith.blogspot.com/. My goal is to pursue writing as a full -time career. In addition to writing books, someday I want to write for a Christian magazine for children. I want to share my life experiences and share the gospel in a unique way. When it really comes down to it, you and I are pretty much the same. We do have our differences, but we also have a lot of similarities. Like you I look forward to seeing the big plan God has for my life. Thank You.

Karoke Night

In case you’re curious, here’s a little bit of what goes on at Fun Life! Fun Life is Young Life’s ministry for people with disabilities in Santa Clartia. In case you can’t understand the words, I’m singing Born To Be Wild! It was a hard song to keep up with! People that know me really well say that’s the perfect song for me. I always say, “Danger Is My Middle Name!” Enjoy!
http://s790.photobucket.com/albums/yy185/FunLifePix/Karaoke%2011-20-2009/?action=view&current=10.flv

1 comments:

Anonymous said…
Rachael, That was GREAT, it is so good to see you enjoying yourself. You, me dear, are one of the most persistant, smart and BRAVE people I know. I know that the LORD does have a special place planned for you.LOVE YOU HUGGS IN CHRIST Uncle Hank and Aunt Donna
December 5, 2009 11:30 PM

Amazing Grace

Have you ever had a time in your life when you’ve thought, Thank you Lord for watching over me? My family and I lived in Granada Hills at the time. My mom, my sister, and I went to Palm Springs on a business trip with my aunt while my dad stayed home with our animals.
The time? About 6:00 a.m. The date? January 17, 1994. Everyone was sleeping soundly until suddenly we felt the hotel room shake. Alarmed, we woke up and turned on the news. 
There had been a big earthquake in Northridge California. It was one of the biggest earthquakes California had seen in years. It caused a lot of damage in many homes – including ours. Fortunately, most things were repairable and replaceable. All except for one thing — me.
We lived in a two-story house. All of our rooms were upstairs. My closet was made of glass. The earthquake was so big that the glass shattered, and my closet fell on my bed! I can’t move very easily. If we were home, I would’ve been an easy target!  My mom and dad would’ve crawled through a pile of glass to try to save me. I could’ve had a bunch of cuts and bruises. Maybe I would’ve died at only 10 years old. It’s only by God’s amazing grace I’m still alive today.
Dear Lord,
Thank you for allowing me to live so that I may proclaim the glory of the Gospel, and tell the world of your amazing grace!
Amen

n

“This Is Now The New Normal”

 

              This devotional is written in loving memory of my father, Rex Benson, who passed away on January 27, 1995. This year marks 15 years since his death.  He’s the man who said, “This is now the new  normal” when I was born.  This is one of the last pictures I have of him before he died.  We’re packing up to go home from our ski trip at Lake Powell in Utah.  That’s me on his shoulders at 11 years old.  What a great time we had! This Thursday marks sixteen years since his death.  What a loving father he was! Dad, thanks for treating me like a normal kid! I love you and  I miss you!

I was born on February 8, 1983.  My mother couldn’t bring me home right away because of complications at birth. Originally, I was supposed to arrive on April 8, but due to lack of oxygen supply to the brain, doctors had to get me out quickly. I was two months earlier than expected.  No one thought I would live.
             My mother often tells me that my father was the one who set the tone for how the family would handle my disability forever. The minute my mom and dad got a positive report from the doctors that I would live, they also told my parents that I would have to see lots of specialists so that they could closely monitor my condition—whatever it was.  I wasn’t diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy until I was three months old.  Shortly after I was born, my father said, “This is now the normal.”
             He meant that it was going to be normal for our family to go to 10 different doctors, I would go to physical and occupational therapy on a weekly basis, that was the way our life was going to be.  That was okay.  His strong leadership is a huge part of what shaped my character today. Thanks Dad.

The Last Place You Look

 

I’m into scrapbooking, but the limited dexterity in my hands makes it difficult.  Someone else has to put the pictures in for me. Recently, I found something that I thought I lost for good.
It was an e-mail from someone named Renee Bondi. She was also in a wheelchair.  She came to speak at a Joni and Friends family retreat.  I e-mailed her because I wanted to thank her for allowing me to talk to her for a while recognizing my need for help. We talked about my frustrations with my aides at home in my day program and wanting to live on my own. After I e-mailed her, she replied back with some advice.
I was so excited, that I printed it out so I could save it and put it in my scrapbook.  I put it on the very bottom shelf where I thought it would be safe. So many different people had been coming in and out of my room helping me with things that it somehow got moved. I went to grab the letter, but it wasn’t there!  What happened to it? I thought.  I had my aides tear my whole room apart looking for it. It’s gone. I thought. I was almost in tears.
            I started blaming my disability.  If I could do it myself, this wouldn’t happen.  I had forgotten that the last aide who helped me with my scrapbook put the letter in the back of the book. I looked there but didn’t see it.  I was in deep despair.  The response back was unexpected. That was pretty special that somebody would take the time to do that – somebody who had been there – who really understands what I’m going through. It’s priceless.  Now we’re friends.  She’s in my prayers.
The aide flipped through the pages and there it was at the back of the book! When I saw it I said, “Thank you Lord!” At least now I know where it is next time I want to look at it.
My letter was in the last place I looked.  Isn’t that just like us? Searching high and low trying to find the right direction to go and it’s right under our noses.  All the answers are right there in the Bible yet that seems to be the last place we look.    We don’t cry out to God until things get really bad. Then we say. “Lord, where are you?”  Just when we think He has left us, the Lord says,  “My child I’m right here!” Then we run to Him. If we ran to Him in the first place, our world would be in a lot less pain. He’s waiting for you with open arms. Will you run to him?
Dear Lord,
Help me to make you the first one I run to.
Amen

Christmas In Heaven

Heaven is s a place where everything is perfect and we’ll be reunited with Jesus and our loved ones who were believers. Have you ever wondered what Christmas is like in heaven? The Bible doesn’t tell us, but I’ve found myself pondering the question a lot the past couple years each time Christmas rolls around. 
On December 3, 2007, my Grandma Benson died at the age of 78 of a massive heart attack.  Christmas Eve was at her house.  One of my favorite Christmas memories with Grandma is baking cookies. We made two kinds.  We made sugar cookies with different cookie cutters. We also made peanut butter with Hershey’s kisses in the middle.
Everyone would be around the table talking about how the year had been for everyone and Grandma Benson would be right next to me.  She would sprinkle the dough with sugar and then roll it out.  I would pick up a cookie cutter, she would help me line it up, and then I would press the cookie cutter into the dough.  When we couldn’t fit any more cookies on the dough, we’d scoop them up and put them on a cookie sheet and get another one.  We’d be at it for hours.  We’d make jokes, we’d laugh, she’d ask me how I was doing in school, etc.  It was a good feeling to have Grandma right next to me. We made Christmas cookies this year for the time in years. For the first time, Grandma wasn’t there. 
The thing I love most about cookies, or anything freshly baked is the smell as it’s in the oven! I also love the warm mouth-watering taste it gives my stomach on the inside because it’s so warm. Grandma was such a servant. When she didn’t have anything to give, she gave. I like to think that she is standing alongside Jesus right now preparing a feast for everyone there. I like to picture heaven like a huge bakery.  I can’t wait to share cookies with Grandma in heaven.  The best part is in heaven we won’t have to worry about calories because there won’t be such a thing. Since heaven is a place where everything is perfect, we’ll taste the best cookies ever made!  See you in heaven Grandma!

The Cardboard Testimonies

 Some days, I long for my heavenly body right now.  Recently, I went to a fundraiser for Young Life.   They asked a group of us to give our testimonies of how Young Life had impacted our lives.  They had us put it on pieces of cardboard.  On one side, we put what our life was like before we came to Young Life.  On the other side, we put how our lives were affected after we came to Young Life. On the front, mine said: “Burdened.” On the back, it said: “Safe and Understood.”
We were doing a rehearsal.   They didn’t have a ramp, so I stayed down in front. While everyone else practiced going on stage, I stayed behind with one of the leaders and practiced turning over a piece of cardboard.  Every time I tried, I either turned the cardboard upside down, or I kept rotating the cardboard- Why is this so hard? I thought.       The leader reminded me that there was a great reward for me in heaven. She was right, but all I could think was, If only I had perfect hands, I would be able to do this. We decided in the interest of time that my leader would help me flip over the cardboard. In those moments when we long for heaven, remember that Jesus walked the earth. I’m sure He longed for heaven many times.
Dear Jesus,
Help me to keep my eyes focused on you.
Amen
1 10 11 12 13